Sexual Violence Reshapes The Brain ~

Factor in a child is in a state like hypnosis until age 5, an age that many are violated .

I was a horrible student , often terrified, shamed by no one hearing me , or noticing  which became  worse with school , and unknowing , I preferred isolation . It has been a Blessing to unravel my past , and avoid triggers as much as possible . 

I certainly have no problem extraditing myself from anyone or anybody who thinks sexual violence is normal for girls or boys , No Force , No Harm, No Normalizing  
Julianne IshlerFollowSocial Editor @Dose & @OMGFacts. Passionate about pop culture and pop-tarts. Twitter: @julianne_ish 💁🏻

Jan 25

How Sexual Violence Reshapes The Female Brain

Sexual assault can seriously harm a woman’s learning skills.
Last year, nearly 1 in 5 women in the United States said they’d either been raped or experienced attempted rape. And even though sexual assault is troublingly common, society still doesn’t fully accept or understand the repercussions.

In the letter Emily Doe penned to her attacker Brock Turner, she wrote, “My independence, natural joy, gentleness, and steady lifestyle I had been enjoying became distorted beyond recognition.”

In addition to the emotional trauma, new research has found that sexual violence changes how the female brain works. A study published in Scientific Reports concluded sexual aggression can disrupt learning processes from puberty into young adulthood.

Using a model known as SCAR (Sexual Conspecific Aggressive Response), pubescent female rats were paired with either an adult male rat, a female rat or left alone in an unfamiliar cage for 30 minutes a day. When caged with adult male rats, the pubescent females were aggressively pinned and mounted while trying to escape.

The team found that pubescent female rats not only experienced immense stress when the males tried to mount them, but also a disruption in their ability to learn behaviors such as caring for offspring. For example, when placed with newborn rats, the females that were caged with adult males didn’t lick or groom their newborns for 17 days. Plus, these female rats retained fewer newly-generated cells in their hippocampus, an area crucial to memory and learning.

While you can’t necessarily project rat behaviors onto humans, the study noted: “Women who have been exposed to severe childhood sexual and/or physical abuse oftentimes suffer from PTSD, which is associated with decreases in amygdala and hippocampal volumes, as well as learning deficits.”

These findings prove a connection between sexual trauma and mental health, but the study’s authors caution literal interpretation of the results, meaning not all women who experience sexual violence are unable to learn maternal or other behaviors.

There is not yet an established model for studying the consequences of sexual aggression on brain function in females, but Shors says, “with new approaches and attention to this issue, we can find out how the female brain responds to aggression and how to help women learn to recover from sexual violence.”
Julianne Ishler

Social Editor @Dose & @OMGFacts. Passionate about pop culture and pop-tarts. Twitter: @julianne_ish 💁🏻

Return of Great Cosmic Mothers ~ It  is Done 

Morgan Lee

The Sisterhood of light has been resurrected and activated upon this planet and each of you who has come to play a role in this has agreed to their own personal activation.

And in doing so, your etherical hands have been joined.

Your DNA was activated and many of you will begin to recall now, your mission.

As you have agreed to be of service to God, to Mother Earth and to humanity, her children, The Power of the Group, being The Sisterhood of light, as such, is available to those who have chosen, now.

As you embody the light, of your multidimensional self , you begin to embody and resurrect the Laws of One and Love back onto Mother Earth herself.

The Sisterhood of light has not been on this planet in this capacity for many of thousands of years. Not since a time known to you as Atlantis.

This is difficult for the human mind to fully understand but as each of you finally choose your power as your own, in reverence, honour, and accept full responsibility for that power, then as a group, and team, of conscious light workers, you become a very powerful force.

Service to a cause of great magnificence is at hand.

Around the planet, positioned to perfection, you hold each others hands and in unison hold the light force, like stitches creating a fabric, the resurrection of The Sisterhood of Light, back into a new manifested reality.

The Power that you all wield, in so much love, will become apparent as you work side by side in the love for Mother Goddess, Mother Earth and all of her inhabitants in full force over the coming months.

The Planet and all of her children will feel the force of this love that The Sisterhood of light will be emanating.

You are asked to be particularly gentle with yourself over the coming days as your physical vehicle integrates this level of light, now contained in your being.

You are asked to allow your minds to expand and see and perceive far beyond what you have allowed yourself to experience so far.

The Sisterhood of Light has returned to the planet and there are many at this time experiencing awareness of the Divine Feminine, Mother Goddess, Pure Source Love.

It Is Done.

Narcissists , Triangulation & Imposible Choices 

Narcissists, Triangulation and Impossible Choices

By 

WRITTEN BY SAVANNAH GREY

Savannah Grey is a Freelance Writer, a Hypnotherapist, Consultant, Sports Fanatic, and Philosopher and has a degree in Psychology. She is the founder of http://www.esteemology.com, a website dedicated to educating and healing survivors of abusive relationships.

Invoking jealousy, creating drama and forcing their partners to make impossible choices are just a few of the ways a Narcissist gets his fix and maintains control.
If a Narcissist can make you feel insecure and be the center of attention at the same time, they are creating their ideal scene for maximum payout. In their mind, to have more than one person wanting them, fighting over them, shows them that they are important, desired and worthy. It doesn’t matter that they have set the scene and created these false scenarios that pit one woman, or one man against another. Initiating jealousy and drama is their agenda. It gives them a perverse sense of superiority. It’s your pain for their pleasure.
It accomplishes a number of things. First is feeds the monster. The beast inside that feeds off of attention, admiration, love, affection, money sex, control, pain…. Second, it creates the persona that they are in high demand. Third, it lets them know they have options. It alleviates some of their anxiety, because they know they are not short on supply.
They don’t care that their behavior will hurt you. They don’t care if it makes you feel insecure or even if it is detrimental to your relationship. These acknowledgements are so beyond them and clearly show a very serious lack of empathy.
What a Narcissist knows is that in these situations it’s typical human nature for us to get angry with our competition. It doesn’t matter that they are the ones that have caused the acrimony. Narcissists are such skilled manipulators and phenomenal liars that they can usually spin it so that their behavior is everyone else’s fault.
What a Narcissist fears most is abandonment. These behaviors are really about controlling others . They don’t want their partners to leave them, not because they care about them, but because they need someone, anyone, to be there, caring about them, fussing over them. Rather than create a stable, happy relationship, based on trust, kindness and reciprocity, they prefer deception.
The other type of triangulation is forcing you to make impossible choices, such as choosing them or your children, them or your job, them or your family, friends, opportunities…. which sets you up for an inevitable downfall.
If you don’t choose them you will surely invoke Narcissistic injury which will cause strife in your relationship. It will also be ammunition to be used against you, again and again in the future. The moment you don’t choose them your stock falls and you get moved to the soon to be discarded list. It is a slight they will never get over and they will never forgive. Choosing something, anything over them is a cardinal sin in their eyes and gives them complete autonomy to do or say whatever hurtful, painful thing they want to you, because you have just given them ample justification, regardless of how unreasonable and ridiculous their request.
If you do choose them they will see how easily you succumbed to their will. They will lose respect for you. An example would be to force you to choose them over your children and once you do they will hold it against you and think, “What kind of a mother chooses someone over their children?”
You may think they want your compliance, but too much of it is a definite turn off. If you’re sitting there thinking – if I say no, they get upset and if I say yes they get upset too – you’d be right. Either decision you make is wrong. It’s a lose, lose scenario for you.
My ex and I were days away from our engagement party. He was making a big fuss about me inviting my brother. He was threatening to cause a scene if I dared to choose my brother over him. My brother had done nothing to him, absolutely nothing. My brother didn’t even know that my ex felt so much animosity towards him. The indiscretion or injury was all in my Narcissist’s head.
If I didn’t invite my brother it would cause a rift between my brother and I that I would never be able to mend. My Narcissist didn’t care about that. He needed me to show him that he was more important to me than everyone else. He needed to dominate, cause rifts between me and my loved ones. He needed to show that his will was the only thing that mattered and he wanted everyone to know it.
The most incredulous thing about that experience, looking back, is that a few weeks after this happened he cheated and left me for his married co-worker. He was looking for a fight, a reason to call it off and make it all my fault. He didn’t care about the damage it would do to my relationship with my brother. All he was thinking about was his agenda and what pawn pieces to move. To this day I am still taken aback by the total lack of empathy and the magnitude of his selfishness.
Narcissists always want you to prove to them how much you care, how much you are willing sacrifice and how willing you are to put them first. This type of behavior is an obvious red flag. Healthy relationships do consist of some compromise, but the giving isn’t always so one sided. Someone that loves and respects you doesn’t feast off of your pain and they wouldn’t ask you to choose between them and someone or something that you really care about. Never blow up your life for someone that wouldn’t cross the street for you. Don’t pack up your life to move to another town to be in a relationship with someone that you only know through part-time, long distance correspondence. In rare occasion it might work out, but the vast majority do not. If your partner requires you to give up your children to be with them, that is a sacrifice that you cannot make and know immediately that this person is not for you.
Love is a miraculous thing when it’s right. When love isn’t right it’s – controlling, manipulative, selfish, unkind, and jealous. When you spot your partner trying to create triangulation that should be your line in the sand that tells you it’s time for you to make your exit.

 

Childhood trauma , is a powerful predictor of psychosis in adulthood ; Duh

“It detracts from the idea that trauma in childhood is a very very powerful predictor of serious problems like experiencing psychotic events in adult life, so of course the brain is involved and of course genes are involved, but not very much, and an excessive focus on those issues takes us away from these very important social factors”
Life events rather than genetics are largely responsible for mental disorders, say psychologists CREDIT: ALAMY

 Sarah Knapton, science editor 

28 MARCH 2016 • 7:47PM

Mental illness is largely caused by social crises such as unemployment or childhood abuse and too much money is spent researching genetic and biological factors, psychologists have warned.
Over the past decade funding bodies like the Medical Research Council(MRC) have spent hundreds of millions on determining the biology of mental illness.
But while there has been some success in uncovering genes which make people more susceptible to various disorders, specialists say that the true causes of depression and anxiety are from life events and environment, and research should be directed towards understanding the everyday triggers.

 
 

Peter Kinderman, Professor of Clinical Psychology at the University of Liverpool, told BBC Radio 4’sToday programme: “Of course every single action, every emotion I’ve ever had involves the brain, so to have a piece of scientific research telling us that the brain is involved in responding emotionally to events doesn’t really advance our understanding very much.
“And yet it detracts from the fact that when unemployment rates go up in a particular locality you get a measurable number of suicides.
“It detracts from the idea that trauma in childhood is a very very powerful predictor of serious problems like experiencing psychotic events in adult life, so of course the brain is involved and of course genes are involved, but not very much, and an excessive focus on those issues takes us away from these very important social factors”
Unemployment and childhood trauma are to blame for many mental disorders

Unemployment and childhood trauma are to blame for many mental disorders CREDIT: ALAMY

Almost half of adults will suffer from a mental health condition at some stage in their life and more than a third of GP surgery consultations are due to mental problems.
One in four people have been diagnosed with some type of mental health problem – most commonly depression. In addition, 18 per cent said they had suffered from such illness, but never been diagnosed.
The UK now has the seventh highest prescribing rate for antidepressants in the Western world, separate figures show, with around four million Britons taking them each year – twice as many as a decade ago.
Yet the MRC spends just three per cent of its research budget funding studies into mental illness, most of which goes towards genetics or neuroscience.
Prof Richard Bentall, also of Liverpool University added: “It’s a tragedy actually. The UK Medical Research Council is one of the biggest funders of medical research in the UK but if you look at the things that they fund, by far the majority are things like brain scanners or gene sequencing machines, almost none of it is going towards understanding psychological mechanisms or social circumstances by which these problems develop.
“It is impossible to get funding to look at these kind of things.”
The MRC said it was currently refreshing its strategic plan and was hoping to increase the amount of money allocated the mental health studies.
“I think it has been a longstanding debate, the issue of nature versus nurture, and the MRC needs to make sure it funds the research which his going to have the most impact wherever it comes from,” said Dr Rob Buckle, Head of Regenerative medicine at MRC.
“The issue here is that mental health is a very complex issue and the fundamental thing is to get a better understanding of the causes and progression of mental illness.
“We would like to spend more of our budget on mental health research and we totally accept this is interdisciplinary and involves neuroscientists and psychiatrists and social scientists and we do fund work around social impacts on mental health.”
However other scientists argued that finding out the root causes of mental illness could prove beneficial to the greatest numbers of people.
Dr Jeff Barrett, who is working on uncovering the genes behind mental illness at the Wellcome Trust’s Sanger Institute said: “If we understand the fundamental biology of the disease it might be relevant in developing new ideas for therapies that are applicable to a wide range of patients.
“So if by doing studies like this we can strongly implicate one area of biology it gives a new lead for drug companies to try to develop new therapies.”
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/03/28/mental-illness-mostly-caused-by-life-events-not-genetics-argue-p/

Are NPD delusional and or mentally unstable ? 

For those who are dealing with this in a spouse, ex, or even close friends. . .from Quora: 
“Are narcissists delusional and mentally unstable?”

 (Editor’s note: Keep in mind that narcissism comes in various degrees and that is is possible to heal from narcissism. . .if the narcissist ever really wants to, which is rare.) 
“I would say that a person whose rage is barely under control, whose original personality has been obliterated, who regards the slightest autonomy in others as a dire threat to his control, who treats his intimates like dogs, who literally gets high off another’s pain, who becomes depressed and down by the happiness of another, who makes a point of betrayal, who entraps and isolates, who falsely accuses, who plays for a sympathy that he knows really belongs to another, who wants leadership but cannot responsibly handle it, and who manipulates every one around him to gang up on his victim is indeed unstable and much, much more.

As for delusional—narcissists only thrive when surrounded by an entourage of flying monkeys, sycophants, dupes and suck-up wannabes. They’re the buffer between him and reality—the narcissist’s bubble—to keep reality at bay and the flimsy ego intact.”

Your Father Created You, but he cannot distory you; Loving Toxic Dad’s from afar 

TO ALL THE BRAVE KIDS WHO BROKE UP WITH THEIR TOXIC DADS

May 18, 2017 
To All the Brave Kids Who Broke up with Their Toxic Dads
 

You are going to be more than okay. Whether it was because of an addiction, constant excuses for not being there, an irresistible urge to put you down, an indifference or inability to give and receive love, his past, pride, selfishness, the fact that he’s weak or scared, or just the heartbreak of dealing with a man who’s broken, you did the hardest break-up that your heart will ever have to endure. You need to understand how brave you are.
He is your creator but it was his job to be much more than that. There should have been a consistent effort on his part – to nurture and shape you. To influence you with his strength, love and kindness. It was his job to teach you that people don’t leave when things get hard. That people fight for what’s worth fighting for. It was his job to be the one person in the world who would never hurt you.

A father should teach you how not to be afraid, to be open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. A father should make you feel like everything will be okay.
You didn’t give up – you realized that you can’t change people. You’ve reached your breaking point and said, screw him and all his darkness. You learned how easy it is to get broken in the effort to keep a relationship with a toxic person. You have learned that no, it is not your job. And no, it is not your fault. As the child it is the father’s job to always be there for you. 
You need to understand that he should have done his best to make you proud. To be there for your first heartbreak and your last. To help you get back up. To know you: who you love, what makes you happy, what moves you, what your dreams and passions are. To know all the depths of you – and you of him.

 

Your father created you, but he can never destroy you. You have realized that loving yourself means being strong enough to cut ties with him, and embracing all the gifts you have in your life.
I know that a toxic father’s power can be haunting – comfortable in its home in your bones. I know you can feel it every time you get close to someone. You’re incredibly uncomfortable letting them see your most vulnerable parts. No matter how much you love someone, you guard your heart as a way to protect yourself from any potential pain you might face. But none of that will spill out very easily. You don’t want anyone’s pity.

Your big, brave heart let go of the only man you truly ever needed when you were not done needing him. Because you know you are worth so much more than dealing with constant disappointments. You deserve so much credit that you definitely do not get enough of.
By letting go, by breaking up with your toxic father, you are fully opening yourself up to your ability to love others. Without the toxicity, there is nothing stopping you to be fearless, embrace life, and embrace yourself. Let yourself be with people who support and make you feel safe – who are worthy of your effort and love. And don’t ever be frustrated if you still love him, just be sure to love him from afar.
By AnnaBash

The Talk ; Lack Thereof Is Lethal In Our Society 

87 % of USA  women : Have Experienced Sexual HarassmentAnd that conversations about healthy sexual relationships need to start a lot earlier.

By Jenavieve Hatch

A new study has found that a vast majority of American women have experienced sexual harassment, from catcalling to unwanted touching.
Researchers at Harvard University surveyed more than 3,000 high school students and young adults between the ages of 18 and 25 in a study about healthy sexual relationships and sexual harassment prevention.
In the study, called “The Talk,” researchers discovered that 87 percent of young women have had to endure sexual harassment in its many forms. The study also found that, though most women have been sexually harassed and more than half of the men surveyed admitted to having harassed a woman before, almost half of all people surveyed “don’t see certain types of gender-based degradation and subordination as problems in our society.” 
The study connected these statistics to the greater issue of sexual violence and campus rape culture, as well as conversations that students are ― or aren’t ― having with parents and educators about healthy sexual relationships, consent, and ethical behavior. According to the study, failures in sex education, as well as lack of conversation about sexuality in the home, are leading young people astray when it comes to respectful sexual behavior.
Researchers found that 76 percent of young people haven’t had conversations with their parents about healthy sexual and romantic relationships, but that almost the same amount, 70 percent, wish that they would have. 
Danielle Lucksted, Prevention and Education Program Manager at Safe Haven Ministries in Grand Rapids, Mich., told HuffPost that young people should be engaging in conversations about respectful sex and relationships at a young age.
“To me, as a sexual and dating violence prevention educator, the ‘sex talk’ falls under a larger umbrella of talking to kids about relationships in general, and this is something that should start as early as possible,” she said. “I’m talking toddler-age. There is no age that is too early to start teaching kids about things like body boundaries, respect, asking permission, and letting them know that they can come to us (as positive adult role models) if they are ever made to feel uncomfortable.”
Lucksted also said that when these conversations don’t occur in the home or at school, young people absorb societal messages instead ― and those messages aren’t always positive or healthy. 
“The unfortunate reality is that if parents aren’t initiating conversations with their children or allowing experts to talk to their kids while at school, they are learning about sex from their television, their peers, or possibly pornography,” she said.
And the stats certainly back this up. Research has shown that abstinence-only education (in which topics of consent and healthy relationships and sexuality are left out of the conversation entirely) results in more unwanted pregnancies and STIs, and that abstinence-only attitudes can do incredible damage to survivors of sexual violence or harassment. 
As researchers in the Harvard study put it, “it is imperative that parents and sex educators proactively address healthy relationships with young people and that parents and other adults intervene when they witness degrading words or behavior. Silence can be understood as permission.”